294. People Follow Care, Not Titles with Mick Spiers

What if the hardest leadership skills are the most human ones? We pull together a month of conversations and share a playbook for leading with presence, purpose, and care—so people don’t just survive at work, they come alive. From micro moments that create mattering, to authentic leadership that fits like your own skin, to change communication that removes uncertainty, to feedback that is firm and compassionate, the thread is clear: people follow care, not titles.

We start with the power of mattering inspired by Zach Mercurio: making people feel seen, heard, valued, and needed. You’ll hear practical ways to turn small interactions into a performance flywheel, including the underrated art of the second impression. Then we explore Matt Poepsel’s path from imitation to authenticity, using a leadership credo and a values-behavior audit to align mission accomplishment with employee welfare. Expect takeaways for coaching new managers so they don’t copy past mistakes but build a style they can sustain.

We dig into change leadership with John Martinka’s reminder that during mergers and acquisitions, the real asset is people. Learn how to communicate early, honest, and often; reframe fear into opportunity; and fill the rumor vacuum with clarity and hope. Finally, Jeff Hancher shows how feedback, delivered with care, transforms potential. We unpack the FEAR traps that block tough conversations and lay out a simple, repeatable approach to candid coaching that builds trust and accelerates growth.

Walk away with three anchoring questions: who needs to hear they matter, how will you show up as your authentic self, and which honest conversation will you have today. If the ideas sparked something, tap follow, share this with a leader who needs it, and leave a quick review telling us which practice you’ll try first.

Chapters

• 0:26 Why People Show Up To Work
• 1:10 October Guests And Core Theme
• 1:43 Zach McCurio On Mattering
• 3:03 Micro Moments And Second Impressions
• 4:37 Matt Pepsel On Authentic Leadership
• 6:16 Guiding New Leaders To Find Themselves
• 8:06 Leadership Credo And Commitments
• 8:46 John Martinka On Leading Through Change
• 10:23 Reframing Fear And Communicating Often
• 12:02 Jeff Hancher On Firm, Caring Feedback
• 14:06 Overcoming FEAR And Giving The Gift

Transcript

Mick Spiers: 0:00

Have you ever stopped to ask yourself, why do people really show up to work every day? What makes them thrive, not just survive? And what is it that separates managers who get results from leaders who bring people alive? This month on the Leadership Project, we've explored some of the most human and often overlooked dimensions of leadership. How we make people feel that they matter, how we help them find their authentic voice, and how we lead them through change. And also how we tell them the hard truths that help them grow. Hey everyone, and welcome back to The Leadership Project. Today is going to be a solo cast where I reflect on our conversations with our October guests, Zach Mercurio, Matt Poepsel, John Martinka, and Jeff Hancher. And through those conversations, a single thread stood out. Leadership is not about power, it's about people, it's about presence, and it's about purpose. So let's unpack what we learnt from each of these extraordinary guests. Firstly, let's go to Zack Mercurio. Zach reminded us that nothing can truly matter to someone who doesn't first believe that they matter. We often tell people to find their purpose, but how can they if they don't first feel worthy of having one? He called this mattering and the power of mattering, the experience of feeling seen, heard, valued, and needed. It's built not through grand gestures, but through micro moments of connection a kind word, a small act of recognition, a moment of genuine curiosity. Zach's research shows that when people feel valued, they become more likely to add value, and that starts a powerful upward spiral. The more we feel valued, the more we contribute, and the more we contribute, the more we see evidence that we matter. He said something that stopped me in my tracks. Your next great act of leadership is your next interaction. And this is a beautiful reminder that the true measure of leadership isn't found in strategy documents or dashboards. It's found in the quality of our human interactions. So your homework here is to work out what you can do in those micro moments. Those little moments where you remember something, where you remember something about an individual, where you take the time to hold space for your team, to make them feel seen, to make them feel heard, to make them feel valued. Instead of telling them your ideas all the time, invite them to bring their ideas to the table and listen. Listen without judgment and listen with presence. Show them that you're paying a hundred percent and full attention to them and they will feel valued. And when they feel valued, they'll bring more value. We spoke in the episode about the importance of our second impression. A lot of people talk about wanting to make a good first impression, but I'm going to tell you, making a good second impression may be even more valuable. And this shows up through interactions like this. Hey, I've been thinking about our last conversation. I've been thinking about what you said, and here's what I've thought about. It shows them that your last interaction with them was important to you, and it makes them feel valued. So think about your micro moments in the workplace with your team and think about how you're going to make everyone feel seen, heard, and valued for them to feel that they matter. And when people feel that they matter, they do things that matter. This was followed up by our great conversation with Matt Poepsel around expanding the circle, enlightened leadership for our new world. Matt shared his journey from a self-described rubbish manager to a leader who discovered that authenticity is the foundation of effectiveness. He talked about how many new leaders try to emulate those who came before them, wearing someone else's leadership style like a coat that doesn't fit. True leadership, Matt said, begins when you stop copying others and start connecting to yourself. He shared a powerful mantra. Mission accomplishment and employee welfare in equal measure. The key essence here is that we succeed through our people, not at the expense of our people. And Matt also reminded us that leadership without self-awareness leads to emptiness, that hollow feeling of success without fulfillment. Wholeness, on the other hand, comes when your values, your behavior, and your leadership style are congruent with each other. So that's your challenge for every leader listening. Ask yourself, are you helping new leaders find themselves? Or just throwing them into the deep end and hoping they swim. Because if we don't help them connect to who they are, they'll simply replicate the mistakes of leaders who came before them. That first journey into leadership is a key one. It's one that's fraught with danger. It's usually also accompanied with a roller coaster of emotions. A newly appointed leader has the euphoric highs that they feel like they've finally been recognized for their prowess, for being good at their craft, being good at what they do. But then comes the thud. And the thud is the anxiety and realization that they're not even sure what it means to be a leader. And then they start looking at other leaders around them and start replicating those behaviors without thinking about it. Often replicating behavior of leaders that they didn't even like themselves. So encourage new leaders to connect to themselves. What do they think good leadership looks like? Ask them to think about all of the leaders that they have had in their career. Which leaders inspired them? And what did those leaders do? What did they do to inspire them? Which leaders demoralize them? And once again, what specifically did those leaders do to demoralize them? And from this, the person can develop their own authentic style of leadership that connects to themselves, one that they'd be proud of. Developing their own leadership credo. Statements like, as a leader, I will. And this is your list of positive attributes of things that you will do as a leader and that you strive to do. And the negative list, the things that you commit that you will never do to another human being. From this, you can develop your own authentic style of leadership. And this is what our new leaders need to do. Our next interview was with John Martinka, who spoke about leading through change and uncertainty. We explored what it means to lead through major change, including mergers and acquisitions, and those unsettling transitions that shake the ground beneath a team's feet. John said something profound. The real asset being bought and sold in a merger and acquisition is the people. And yet when organizations go through change, they find that fear is the first reaction. People worry about losing their jobs, their sense of belonging, their safety. But John taught us that great leaders reframe the narrative from fear of loss to excitement about what they might gain. Great leaders communicate early, honest, and often. They help people see that change can mean new capital, new ideas, and new opportunities. It doesn't all have to be doom and gloom. And one of the most important takeaways for me was this that people don't actually fear change. They fear uncertainty. And in the absence of information, they make up their own stories. So it's up to us, it's our job to fill that vacuum with clarity, with compassion, and with hope. And to remind our teams that they are the asset that's being invested in. So if you and your team are going through some kind of merger and acquisition here, instead of being fearful all the time of loss and the challenges that it's going to bring, take a moment to reframe and think about well, what positive might come from this? What new opportunities might arise and how might we make the best of this situation? And finally, we had Jeff Hancher, who spoke to us about firm feedback in a fragile world. Jeff's story hit me deeply. He shared his journey from poverty and pain to a place of leadership shaped by mentors who cared enough to tell him the truth, even when it hurt. He reminded us that we grow through feedback and that avoidance isn't kindness, it's neglect. Jasp used the acronym fear, F E A R, to describe why leaders avoid feedback. F was for fallout. What if this ruins my reputation? E was for emotion. What if they cry? What if they get angry? A is for amateur. What if I don't know how to do it right? And R was for retaliation. What if this all backfires? But then he shared a story of his own mentor, Sean, the man who once looked him in the eye and said Enough is enough. I'm not going to let you waste your potential. That tough conversation changed Jeff's life. He went on to earn twelve promotions, become a senior leader, and now teaches others what his mentor taught him. That firm feedback delivered with care is one of the purest forms of love in leadership. We can be both kind and candid, and in fact we must be. The reframe that I like to think of here is that feedback is a gift, and to always remember that people can't fix what they don't know about. Have a think about yourself. If you were doing something that was infuriating another human being and they didn't tell you about it, you'd be devastated. You'd be going, Oh, why didn't they tell me? Why didn't they tell me that what I was doing, my actions or my inaction, was making their life harder than it need to be. And then flip that onto the other side. Imagine you're the one that's withholding the feedback. Withholding the feedback is robbing them from the opportunity to address the thing that's holding them back. So if you've been avoiding a tough conversation, one that someone else needs to hear, you need to step into the breach. You need to think about the fact that you're preventing this person from learning and growing and from unlocking their full potential. So in closing, when I step back and reflect on these four conversations, a clear message emerges. People don't follow titles, they follow care. They don't need perfect leaders, they need present leaders. And they don't need grand gestures. They need small, meaningful moments of connection. Zach Mercurio showed us that we must make people feel that they matter. Matt Poepsel taught us to lead from authenticity and self-awareness. John Martinka reminded us to leave with clarity through change. And Jeff Hancher showed us that feedback given with care is an act of service, not criticism. These are not soft skills. They are the hard edge of human leadership. So I'll leave you with three questions to reflect on this week. Who in your world needs to be reminded that they matter? Number two, are you showing up as your authentic self or wearing someone else's coat? And number three, who do you need to have an honest, caring conversation with? The one that might just change their life. If today's solo cast made you pause and reflect, I'd love to hear from you. What resonated with you? Which of these lessons are you going to apply this week? You can share your reflections on LinkedIn or YouTube or just shirts for The Leadership Project with Mick Spiers and join our growing community of leaders committed to making workplaces more human. Because leadership is not about being in charge, it's about caring for those in your charge. So until next time, remember to stop, reflect, and ask yourself who did I help feel seen, heard, and valued today? In the next episode, we're going to be joined by Steve Fortunado. He's going to talk to us about transforming leadership through hospitality and connection.