248. Embracing Fear: Unlocking Your Potential Through Courage with Mick Spiers

Courage isn't about being fearless—it's about taking decisive action while feeling afraid. Join us as we dive into the science of bravery, revealing how this essential quality can be deliberately cultivated by anyone seeking to grow as a leader.

Drawing from my transformative conversation with former Marine and leadership expert Jill Shulman, I explore how the most courageous people still experience fear—they've simply mastered working through it. True bravery manifests not in grand heroic gestures, but in everyday choices: speaking up when it matters, making difficult decisions, and pushing past self-doubt. These seemingly small acts fundamentally shape who we become.

The competence-confidence cycle offers a practical framework for overcoming fear inertia. We don't feel confident until we've proven our capabilities, yet we can't develop competence without taking action. This creates a powerful loop where each brave step builds both skill and self-assurance. The key? Start before you feel ready, because readiness is largely a myth.

When we reframe obstacles as opportunities rather than barriers—"the obstacle is the way"—we transform our relationship with challenges. Every difficulty becomes a chance to develop resilience and sharpen our leadership abilities. The greatest rewards come not from avoiding discomfort but from embracing the journey of growth itself.

Ready to build your courage muscle? Start small but start today. Take one action that makes you slightly uncomfortable. Use Mel Robbins' five-second rule to push past hesitation. Reframe fear as a signpost pointing toward important growth. What brave step will you take this week? Share your journey with us as we learn and lead together.

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Bravery Science
• 0:27 Welcome to The Leadership Project
• 0:58 Key Takeaways from Jill Shulman
• 1:26 Overcoming the Inertia of Fear
• 2:41 The Obstacle Is The Way
• 3:50 Cultivating Everyday Bravery
• 7:47 Episode Closing and Next Week Preview

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

What if the very thing you fear most is the key to unlocking your full potential? What if courage isn't about being fearless but about taking action in the presence of fear? And what if I told you that your greatest growth is waiting just outside your comfort zone? Today we're diving into the science of bravery, the psychology of overcoming fear and how you can train yourself to take bold steps towards the life and leadership you truly want. Welcome back to the Leadership Project. Today's going to be a solo cast where I reflect on the recent conversation I had with Jill Shulman, a former Marine leadership expert and keynote speaker with a deep understanding of applied positive psychology. Our conversation on bravery was nothing short of transformational and I want to share with you my biggest takeaways and then my own lessons that I've learned about overcoming fear during my career. Here are my biggest takeaways from Jill Bravery is not the absence of fear, it's acting in spite of it. Jill shared that the most courageous people still experience fear. They've just learned how to work through it.

Speaker 1: 1:14

Number two bravery is a skill, not a personality trait. It's something that we can all cultivate. With deliberate practice, we can build bravery. Number three true courage is about everyday choices Speaking up in a meeting, making a difficult decision or pushing past self-doubt these are all acts of bravery that shape who we become. Number four the stories we tell ourselves matter. There's almost nothing more powerful than the story we tell ourselves about ourselves in our own mind. Fear often comes from narratives we've internalized about what we can or cannot do. Changing those stories can change everything. It was an amazing conversation with Jill and I want to build on it now with some of my own thoughts.

Speaker 1: 2:06

The first one is about inertia and how we overcome the inertia of fear. One of the biggest hurdles in personal growth and leadership is inertia that a body at rest tends to stay at rest, but equally, a body in motion tends to stay in motion. So get in motion. The paralyzing effect of fear keeps us stuck in our comfort zones. So how do we overcome that inertia and get started? Brendan Burchard talks about the competence-confidence cycle, and it's one of the most practical ways to understand this. Here's how it works we don't feel confident until we've proven to ourselves that we're capable, and it's one of the most practical ways to understand this. Here's how it works we don't feel confident until we've proven to ourselves that we're capable, but we don't gain competence without taking action. The more we act, the more competent we become, and the more competent we become, the more confident we feel. It's a loop, not a straight line. The key is to start before you feel ready, because readiness is a myth. Start before you're ready and take those small steps to build your confidence and, in turn, build your competence. So they build on each other and, before you know it, you have a virtuous cycle that builds on itself.

Speaker 1: 3:26

While we're unpacking insights from other great thinkers, let's lean into this a little bit more. This idea of leaning into discomfort is backed by so many great thinkers. Think of Carol Dweck and her work on the growth mindset. Fear holds us back when we believe our abilities are fixed, but the truth is we grow through challenge and effort. The obstacle is not a stop sign, it's the way forward. The obstacle is the way, as Ryan Halliday would put it, who is a modern day Stoic. Stoicism teaches us that obstacles are not in the way of success, they are the path to success. Every challenge is an opportunity to build resistance and to build our skills. It's what sharpens us. The obstacle is the way. It's the way to growth. It's the way to learning. It's the way to unlocking our full potential.

Speaker 1: 4:25

You've also heard us on the show talk about Timothy Galway before and his work on the inner game. The biggest opponent we face is not external. It's the internal voice of self-doubt. Mastering that internal dialogue is your key to overcoming fear. So what are your internal obstacles that are holding you back?

Speaker 1: 4:49

And this all comes towards this thought that it's the happiness of the pursuit, not the pursuit of happiness. One of the biggest mindset shifts we need to embrace is this Happiness is not a destination. It's the byproduct of growth, challenge and progress. When we chase comfort, we stagnate, and comfort is is truly one of the worst addictions that you can have. But when we lean into fear and uncertainty, we grow. The journey is the reward, because it's who we become along the way that truly matters. Come along the way that truly matters.

Speaker 1: 5:29

This unpacks itself really clearly around goal pursuit. When you achieve a goal, it's usually quite anticlimactic. It might feel good for a short period of time, but then it's always well, what next? So embrace the journey. It's about the happiness of the pursuit, not the pursuit of happiness. And instead of asking what if I fail, ask yourself what do I get to become by trying and finally think about how do we cultivate bravery. So how do we turn this into action?

Speaker 1: 6:05

Here are some simple but powerful steps. Start small, but start now. Take one small action today that makes you slightly uncomfortable. Send that email. Speak up in that meeting. Take that first step. Reframe fear as a guide. If something scares you, it's probably a sign that it's important. Lean into that feeling. Stop avoiding that thing that you've been avoiding and step in to the problem and step out of your comfort zone. Use the five second rule. This one comes from Mel Robbins. If you hesitate, count down five, four, three, two, one. Then take action before fear talks you out of it. And once you're in motion, you're in motion. Embrace the growth mindset. View every setback as a lesson, not a failure. Progress over perfection. And finally, don't forget to reflect and celebrate wins. Keep a journal of brave moments. It will remind you how much courage you've already shown.

Speaker 1: 7:15

Bravery isn't about grand heroic acts. It's about the everyday movements where we choose courage over comfort. So here's my challenge to you what's one act of bravery you can take this week? Maybe it's having a tough conversation, taking a leap towards a new goal or simply pushing past that moment of hesitation, whatever it is. Take action, because the only way to build bravery is to practice it. I'd love to hear from you what have you taken away from the conversation with Jill Shulman or this solo cast today. When have you faced something that created fear, but you acted despite that fear? When have you built your courage and what did you learn from it?

Speaker 1: 8:05

In the next episode, we're going to be continuing our journey of celebrating amazing women in our society thought leaders as we celebrate International Women's Month, and I'll be joined by the amazing Heather Younger and it's going to build beautifully on our content this week around courage and bravery, as she talks us through the art of self-leadership. If you're getting great value from our content, we would love it if you would send us an email, send us a note and tell us what's resonating with you. What are you learning? Who have been your favorite guests? Who would you like to see us have on the show into the future? And thank you as we go on this journey, as we learn together and lead together.

Speaker 1: 8:54

Thank you for listening to the Leadership Project at mickspearscom. A huge call out to Faris Sadek for his video editing of all of our video content and to all of the team at TLP Joanne Goes On, gerald Calabo and my amazing wife Say Spears. I could not do this show without you. Don't forget to subscribe to the Leadership Project YouTube channel, where we bring you interesting videos each and every week, and you can follow us on social, particularly on LinkedIn, facebook and Instagram. Now, in the meantime, please do take care, look out for each other and join us on this journey as we learn together and lead together.